What Took So Long? Eric Swalwell's Unsolved Mystery Is Now Answered.

AP Photo/Alex Brandon

What do you think was the final straw?

Was it knowing that her husband had sex with the Chinese spy who exchanged that sex for his information and official favors for her country, the People's Republic of China?

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Was it being part of this generation's version of the Sen. Ted Kennedy (D–Mass.) and Sen. Chris Dodd (D–Conn.) waitress sandwich club that Swalwell, Sen. Ruben Gallego (D–Ariz.), and Rep. Jimmy Gomez (D–Calif.) refashioned into what they called the "Cool Kids Clique"?

Did the dingle dangle Snapchat "videos of himself masturbating and other perverted Snapchat messages while he was married" that he shared with other women have anything to do with it?

Was it the FBI shakedown of Swalwell at the airport when the feds confiscated all of his electronic gear because he was under investigation — again — this time for his nefarious sexual antics under color of authority?

Was it the final straw when he had to lie to her with impunity to cover it all up?

Maybe.

But by many accounts, Eric Swalwell's wife, Brittany Watts, has made a decision about his past and her future with the "Snapchat King of Congress." Watts has been spotted for quite a while without a wedding ring, and the hosts on Newsmax are of the opinion that Watts is O-U-T.

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They are leading "separate lives," according to Yahoo News.

There will be no parades for the erstwhile Mrs. Swalwell. No phalanx of feminists will be standing outside their one-time home with their hands formed into hearts, reaching to the sky to declare themselves forever fans of Brittany. It must be some kind of blow to the Swalwells that these cranks will raise their praises to a woman who allegedly choreographed the executions of her babies but not to her. Weird.

The heretofore unknown news site known as Canyon News reported that after "multiple women reported unsolicited nude photographs and explicit messages" and Swalwell creepily tracked them, the former lovebirds had broken up. His first marriage blew up, too.

Swalwell, 45, is reportedly separated from his current wife of nearly 10 years, Brittany Ann Watts. They have three children together. 

He was previously married to Melissa Maranda (2007-2010). That marriage ended in divorce. He was investigated in 2020 after being named as a suspect in a story published by Axios regarding an alleged relationship between him and a suspected Chinese spy, Fang Fang, 49, known as Christine Fang. 

The relationship began in 2012, when she allegedly was cultivating contacts with California politicians who the Chinese government believed would have promising futures in politics.

And that's not all he's accused of doing.

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Rep. Anna Paulina Luna (R-Fla.) says Swalwell didn't just have carnal knowledge of Fang Fang on multiple occasions; he seeded Congress, too — with Chinese spies.

Swalwell was stopped by FBI agents at San Francisco International Airport in mid-August, and then the FBI searched his house in Washington, D.C., where they got "additional undisclosed potential evidence,” according to People magazine.

He was urged by California Democrats to run for governor because he was better than Xavier Becerra. Pause there for a moment. Better than Xavier.

So, at long last, Eric Swalwell, the amazing, duplicitous fart-meister, has failed at two marriages, left a congressional seat, and been yanked from the governor’s race because he can't keep his lies straight and his pants zipped.

Bye.

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